If Men Gave Birth

Maternity leave would last two years...with full pay!

There'd be a cure for stretch marks.

Natural childbirth would become obsolete. {Eg: You want me to push this through WHAT?!!}

Morning sickness would rank as the nation's No. 1 health problem.

All methods of birth control would be improved to 100% effectiveness.

Children would be kept in the hospital until they were toilet-trained and over the "Terrible Twos."