Bumper Stickers 2

Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.

Whisper my favorite words: "I'll buy it for you.

" Suburbia: where they tear out the trees & then name streets after them.

Stress is when you wake up screaming & you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.

Adults are just kids who owe money.

Who are these kids and why are they calling me Mom?

I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.

You! Off my planet!

Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.

I majored in liberal arts. Would you like fries with that?

It's not hard to meet expenses, they're everywhere.

Jury: Twelve people who determine which client has the better lawyer.

Let not the sands of time get in your lunch.

Mediocrity thrives on standardization.

Reality is the only obstacle to happiness.

The 2 most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.

Back Up My Hard Drive? How do I Put it in Reverse?

I just got lost in thought.

It was unfamiliar territory.

Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.

Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it.